Author: Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.
honeycomb

honeycomb

we grow in towers and in hightides and blossom with the coming of winter in the anomaly of bittersweet outbursts we find some comfort in woolen sweaters. our lack of empathy, guarded in the white cuffs around our necks; there are tears meditating on your face, but we cry rebellion as you loathe in a forlorn corset. our bodies…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

What am I alive for?

What am I alive for?

What am I alive for? Is it to breathe the easy insolence of the wind, to see it circle around a cherry sky strike violets against the blue (birthing violence into a calm) causing merciful ripples into a dead lake. Is it to feel the fables rustle the leaves dense green and raging into the void of a parable…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

When We’re Dead

When We’re Dead

How long until I forget the sound of your voice- the sunlight seeping in through your bedroom window, you telling me you’d rather talk in the dark. Escaping to your terrace and taking pictures of the sunset, talking with the flowers blooming in the spring. Did you know I was watering our grave? Will I forget our music, the…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Atrophy

Atrophy

The gravel in her tongue atrophies along with the rest of her body, lurid and every bite in is just another bite out. There is a road that travels down her throat and each tongue that rides it through feels the sick burn of falling over cold, tiled floors kneeling in front of dirty toilet sinks spanning the garish…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Waves

Waves

Another wave hits the shore. It scrapes the sand and I think that perhaps it’s wanting to be home. My mother always used to tell me that sometimes somethings that are a part of something don’t feel at home in the comfort of familiarity. Behind my precariously hooded eyes I dream of a tide – a call for help…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Cancer Season

Cancer Season

I felt it as the first wave crashed upon me- the water percolating on my skin forming dews, resting around my chest. I felt it as it drowned my throat and I wished that it would drown me too. But since the summer of 2016, I have learnt how to swim in prolonged tides, in deep water, in a…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

On Omniscience and Decay

On Omniscience and Decay

It is excruciatingly painful to be self-aware – to know your own flaws to the see the morbid direction in which you are willingly walking to be a slave to old, destructive habits. It’s almost like I am a corpse, you would have to be a moldy, mourning cadaver to be able to digest the uncanny way in which…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

To The Girl in The Mirror

To The Girl in The Mirror

It is like being skinned, like being slowly unguarded and left in a formidable puddle of my own dearth. I sit on a couch, a sofa, a loveseat, anything to cushion the bone I am about to be. “Let’s undress this sweetheart, we are only here to celebrate nudity.” But, mother, I have never been comfortable in my own…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Drugged

Drugged

From the duvets of undivided procrastination I allow myself a narrow glimpse into the fertile garden of my flaws, through the shadowed, omnipresent remorse, I can read a story it goes- she lets herself grow through others she waters herself from the sins they tried to forgive, her unholy chest is unknowingly accustomed to jumping from one friend to…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Fishes

Fishes

I have always felt that humans were like the sea- the unfathomable girth of their chests as they inhale the decadence of their families, the expansive ripples in their eyes like the tides washing over their moral sense, polluted in plastic the sea bass trying to breathe through polythene, coral reefs around the groin something beautiful made from something…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

To My Temporary Friend

To My Temporary Friend

In the sultry ambiance, I visited the virginity in your soul, the curves- I adored, I felt through the tangible fathom of an inch below my skin, I tasted through the flourishing tactility from my scathing tongue, I had never felt so legitimate until I saw your naked skin peeling into mine and the nonsensical validity I searched for in…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Leakages

Leakages

There is an open faucet under my bed, glazed over my body I am leaking into the people around me- I have never been this honest.   In my head, my arms are outstretched draped across a bathtub, two toes sticking out like odd deformities. There is nothing aesthetic about it. The marble I rest my back against I…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Not Your Daughter

Not Your Daughter

my father never saw me smoke he didn’t see the way the clouds come out of my mouth and make beautiful shapes in the sultry sky between me and Her. I have never liked the way a cigarette felt between my two fingers but the sight of it between Her lips- a dream, a sea, I’m drowning- made my…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Organics

Organics

There is something indecent in the way she covers her body. Veins are sliding against the thick undertones of her pale skin, a bone on her elbow and peeks of hair unnecessary but unshaved, all are paving to her chest, filled with oxidants from things not inhaled. There, sitting on the edge of the placenta where she lives, a…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

And A Glimpse

And A Glimpse

All forms of desire that shouldn’t be desired slither into her young mind. No two thighs touching and the sighs they breath out: consulting. Cautious and crude the raw flakes are dancing. A fresh, soft bow plunged across a clean sky. Flowery revolts and nights spent cleaning after her messy self (sifting, succumbing; brain-dead, overcoming) She can make her…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Five Thoughts

Five Thoughts

Five long, sticky and clinging thin, thinner, thinnest: numbering. One small and short, a stubble amongst the firs on her palm, the rest four ticking like ugly babies shoved in a cradle in a casket. The lines bleed out a night’s hard work we cry crimson and one sticks out longer than the rest. The phalanx, its heart, knobby…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Arsonist

Arsonist

I see a corridor and I see it with all its edges. I throw a burning ember on the wooden floor and the mustard wallpaper suddenly shudders; the shroud that left my room uncovered now melts and slithers into my mouth. It soaks into my throat and curls into my lungs like the smoke of a furnace burning under…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

1922

1922

She said she never had boyfriends.

But she also said something about

a tulip growing in her garden of daisies –

some unplanned turns that knocked her

perfectly clean, white socks out from

right below her small feet.…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

How Can I Feel?

How Can I Feel?

Every edge that I jump from; every memory that I try to bury within the freckled folds of my unkempt bedsheets; every word that I take back and fill my half-empty stomach with (never not empty); all comes back like gruel on the back of a bathroom sink. I hear voices telling me to forgive them and forgive myself…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Too Fat to Drown

Too Fat to Drown

A distorted girl, too round around the edges no numbing mind still embedding into the malleable mush that her fat, clammy fingers cannot hold yet. But let us still stuff an oversized expectation of casual conformities, forgotten deformities into the thick folds of her feeble soul. Running and glazing, two birds fighting killing the curves no camera can show.…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Of Waves of Reminiscence

Of Waves of Reminiscence

I swear I heard the sun burn something alive under the ocean. I heard a scream just as I lit the matches to a wooden coffin with no body inside to keep it warm. My sister’s hair was always braided, and when those brown strands came undone, so did my mother. I still remember white flowers hanging from my…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

The Nuances in Time

The Nuances in Time

Suddenly. I am intelligently intoxicated. Rushing. This hollow city has over-crowded. Enigma. I stay blind, but my eyes open. Serendipity. I speak and I wound my throat. Time and time again I fill these voids with an echo for a chance to prove myself. Time ages me; and like a dandelion’s petals the scales slowly fall off my eyes.…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Cat in the Cold

Cat in the Cold

Crib about jetlag. Binge eat on a flight serving oily fries. Hang on trees bungee jump and throw up on your car seat. Kill time and watch flashlights under water. Douse in gasoline, lithe and smooth and green. Suck on tangerine Make sense of your friend’s cold coleslaw. Served in casual cutlery. Cute. Mess up sheet, loosen your pocket,…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Presence in Absence

Presence in Absence

You are an omnipresent cold embrace, that keeps me shivering through the empty nights. You are the dawn of day and the moon, that blinds me and keeps me awake. You are a ceaseless string of memories in my lucid dreams; and the jolt of somnambulism. You are a sinking ship, that drowns me slowly, whenever I close my…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

I Am Eating

I Am Eating

Empty and white; slowly stripping down to collarbones and shiny shoes that look nice with her thinning silver gown. Grown to adore those cold feet and sleek ridges that adorn the backs of a hundred pale faces on paper. Scarred and hushed; lips quivering like the soul in her teeth, biting nimble nothings and keeping it within her tongue.…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.

Burnt Tongue

Burnt Tongue

Burnt tongue big bubbles rising from his throat. Lean muscles sunk neck snug in-between white burnout bedsheets. Red eyes veins popping morsels stinging, burning teeth and tongues. White hands clutching seats grasping toilet paper. Thick white chunks – stopping words – flowing out of his mouth. Wrapping jeans baggy sweatshirt dripping collar bones, sick all over sheets sick into…

Paakhi Bhatnagar

About Paakhi Bhatnagar

Paakhi Bhatnagar is a student from India and an avid reader of historical fiction. She is a passionate feminist and blogs about current politics and feminist issues. She also possess the uncanny ability of turning everything into a debate.